Category Archives: Non-Stories

A non-story: Why I Hate the Internet


I saw this girl on the train. Hey, girl.


At 8:30 in the morning, she was reading this book. Hey, giiiiiiirl!


Now that I’ve looked up Mandingo Pt. II, Amazon keeps trying to sell me this book. I hope Facebook doesn’t hear about this.


A non-story: Gimme Your Fingernails!

moonvestA crazy old homeless guy challenged me to fisticuffs on the train last night. There wasn’t any reason—he was just crazy and full of energy after eating a small bag of chips.

I had Captain America and Kimbo Slice ready for him but I just kinda looked at him like “dude, really?” and he got off the train without incident. This other guy looked at me and shrugged. I did the same.

The end.